The Avalonian Chronicles
All official transcripts and records obtained through the TLE Office Of Interstellar Records.
NEWS FLASH: Bot Colony Ship Destroyed! Self-Defense or Prejudice?
Lacuna Date 6523-04-24 01:00 hours Stellar Time
By Barabari Blabbermouth
A bright flash of light washed through several systems today near Oullusnosch in Zone 0|0, as a ship went critical after being fired upon. The ship in question was a colony ship from the Bot Empiure of the MEGA CORP alliance who is apparently in a new era of colonization. This new era has had a dramatic beginning though, in that it's first glorious ship of robotic citizens was "neutralized" just barely within a neighboring system.
Comm-links in the area heard their last few moments calling for a cease-fire, even as the ship left a trail of plasma, debree, and robotic bodies. The pleas for mercy ended when the ship's power cells exploded in a massive shockwave. Their calls went unasnwered.
Why was this ship destroyed? Some say it was because they were attempting to colonize a claimed system. Others whisper of something more sinister. Prejudice. The viseral hatred of anything claiming to be life that is not organic. Which is it? We may never know in this case... the "defending" system has declined to divulge any information and representatives are no longer available for interview.
The Bot Empire's reaction to this incident was to scream: "WAAAAAAAAAAAARRRR!" Military analysts suspect that if this occurs, it will be a very short war, since neither party involved is very advanced technologically. Brief military transmissions were intercepted from the Bot Empire including statements of plans to sabotage infrastructure. No further details are available at this time since the transmition was abruptly terminated.
GUNNER'S PERSONAL LOG
Lacuna Date 6523-04-24 7:10am local time
Sgt. McNab, SAW Gunner: Today some idiot flew a colonyship into our system. Guess they didn't read the Lacuna Conventions on colonization.
The Colonel ordered me to fire... thats what we we are trained to do. But I was a bit reluctant, it was a colony ship after all. Private Briggs checked the scans, said he detected no life on board. Don't know that I believe him. I didn't confirm his readings. I just have to follow orders anyway, right?
The fireworks were spectatcular... but I never expected something so beautiful to be so... disturbing.
Lacuna Date 6523-04-25 02:00 hours Stellar Time
Market Crash & Rebound
by Alexander Kashinkov
Yesterday, trade prices crashed as the market was flooded by hundreds of hulks at low prices. The offered trades were in bundles of 50 for only .1 essentia. Galaga, the Lacuna empire which offered them, is among the top ranked residents and is described as "A Trade Based Society". But this was more than just trade, this was giving away the kitchen sink.
Our investigators have reason to believe that the recent changes in technology brought this market crisis into effect. With new and larger types of hulks now available for production, it may be that other empires will be upgrading their fleets as well. How the market will handle this... is yet unclear. At present it seems to be bouncing back after all the extreme sales were snapped up by eager buyers.
But this foreshadows a deeper concern among traders and merchants. With the arrival of newer, massive hulks; what will the happen to the market when Lacunans begin selling not just 4.6 million resource loads for one essentia, but hundreds of millions for.... one essentia. Will it cut out the small business empires? Will the large empires monopolize the market and strangle the "little guy"? Analists are still evaluating the concern.
As of today consumers eagerly watch for the next big trader to upgrade and offload his fleet. At least on the consumer's end things look very promising.
Lacuna Date 6523-04-25 03:20 hours Stellar Time
by Marti Medelsum
Today marks a semi-private milestone in one empire's history. A massive undertaking, requiring tremendous organization, labor, and of course funds.
The empire, which has made it clear it wishes to remain unnamed due to security issues, performed a massive, automated launch of 97 cargo ships from one planet to it's sister colony in the next system. The effort was in order to provide raw materials for a classified project, as well as "a test of our ability to coordinate and launch a large scale fleet exercise with applications not just to resource movements". That is a direct quote from a three star Navy General who oversaw this entire operation.
The total materials moved are estimated at 400 millions, the bulk of the cargo ships consisting of standard, maxed hulks. Each round trip is close to 30 minutes start to finish.
All in all, it is a proud day for this civilization, its technichians, and shipping industry and its other, classified sections as well.
Lacuna Date 6523-04-26 12:21 hours Stellar Time
STELLAR STUDIES: Galactic Upheaval
By Dr. Phil Ossuphee
We have all been subjected today to the fabric of our continuum fluctuating. What principles are involved, that bypass and supersede the very laws of nature that we are accustomed to? Time dilation and temporal displacement are common reports. Déjà Vu and even Jamais Vu are noted among many. Actions fully performed are suddenly not even begun. How can this be grasped by the average, simpleminded Lacunan? Chicken Little.
The folk tale of the chicken that received a bump on the head and perceived that the world was ending is a reasonable parallel for the purpose of comprehension. One minor difference being, that Chicken Little's imagined scenario is in our case... very real. Yes, the sky really is falling.
Many concepts have existed of the nature of our existence. Foolish ideas such as a turtle carrying the world on its back, a Titan upholding the world, or even a flat earth which you could fall off the edge of have all been discarded as we have advanced in knowledge and technology. But the universe is still vast and much of it not fully understood... by most.
I would compare our existence to that of a computer program. All the myriad lines of data functioning normally have been... bogged down. Mayhap the processing core is insufficient to keep up with the work load or the quantity data streamed through the line is too great to be sustained efficiently by the current level of telephone service. These analogies can help us comprehend how time itself warps in our perspective.
What does this mean to the average man or woman? It may mean nothing in the end, for it may be that everything will work itself out as usage resumes a more normal level. On the other hand it may mean that the universe as we know it is unstable, subject to breaking down and collapsing, destroying us all. At the very least, it will mean frustration and confusion in our attempts to go about our daily affairs.
Such concerns and experiences might drive the slow of wit to religious fervor. Some, seeing the complexity of our universe may imagine that there is some master mind, some designer behind it all. They would then leap to the conclusion that they should offer some sort of communication, prayers or even e-mails to this higher power seeking assurances that all will be well. But, clearly no such higher being exists. It is a well founded fact of science that the Lacuna-verse came about purely by chance, time and accident. There is therefore no intelligent being behind it all.
And so, that leaves it in our hands. What the future hold is up to us entirely. If a toy is broken, we must either fix it or dispose of it. Of course, we cannot easily dispose of our universe, so we would be much inclined to repair it and resume its normal and natural functioning state.
Therefore, I propose that we imitate the movement once spawned upon that most ancient of polluted worlds, Earth. The "Green" movement. In this, we should downsize all of our factories, reduce the inventory of our war machines, slow over population of our worlds... and allow the universe to be restored to a more natural state. Thus we may save the universe. Our presence is, of course, unnatural and disruptive. We must declare worlds to be preserved as pristine habitats and natural parks - uncolonizable. Only thus, can our universe truly come back into balance as it should be.
For those interested in contributing to this effort, the website for financial contributions and Universe-Green guidelines is: Http:\\Lacuna-Green.Kom
Editor's note: Dr. Phil Ossuphee is an Interstellar Cartographer, the Professor Emeritus of the Lacuna Mental Institute, holds a D.A.S., a Nuc. E. and a D.D.S.
Somewhere in deep space...
Exiting hyperspeed, a small, shiny probe enters a system at the edge of the expanse and takes up orbit. It runs system checks, then begins scanning the system for planetary bodies, ore contents, water resources and... life.
Half way through its initial scans, it begins sending data to its planet of origin, when suddenly a proximity alert is triggered. A sleek black fighter ship emerges from the glare of the sun, pulse lazers blasting the probe to pieces. Remnants of the probe clatter against its hull as it passes in the silent vacuum of space. Then, in a flash of light, the ship disappears into hyperspeed.
The only report received is a brief scan of the system, its 5 planets and something else in the system. Something massive and metallic...
NEWS FLASH: LMC Leak Reveals New Shipping Law
Lacuna Date 6523-05-01 09:48 hours Stellar Time
By Barabari Blabbermouth
Reliable sources have discovered that the Lacuna Maritime Commission (LMC) has approved and implemented a new shipping law, though it has not been publicly announced yet. Previously, legal waste to star dumping was strictly performed only by manned ships due to safety issues. Even so, many empires have been using various forms of automation covertly and all governments have turned a generous and blind eye to such activities. But now, it automation is being legalized.
Our sources, after picking up on the leaked information, has pointed to the Lacuna Central Documentation Project, specifically the "changes.txt" and the api documentation as containing the details of this new system.
A new law such as this will certainly have its quirks and flaws to be worked out, but Lacunans everywhere have been calling for just such authorization to be implemented. It is a rare thing when the powers that be listen so closely and well to the populace.
NEWS FLASH: U.F.O. or
Secret Lacuna Corp Project?
Lacuna Date 6523-05-21 22:15 hours Stellar Time
By Barabari Blabbermouth
The reports have come pouring into police stations, military and civilian agencies, F.B.I. (Federal Bureau of Irritations), and others. Phone companies are having their phone lines and e-mail systems overloaded. What is this all about? Is it some hoax? A government plot to create panic in the citizens and thereby create further dependence upon government "protection"? One thing is for sure, this is not your typical nut-job or head-case reporting fiction, because all the reports have a common description: A swirling blue disk.
Lacuna Corp denies responsibility. Local military instillations also deny culpability by saying they are not testing any new military aircraft. But if no one has done it... then who did? Or shall we say what? Is this a phenomena like the aurora borealis? It is real. It does exist. Everyone and their dog has seen. Even my prize winning Pekingese has notice it and barked vociferously at it.
Some report strange events surround the appearance of this Swirling Blue Disk, such as: internet connections freezing up, cell phones blinking on and off, even whole colony ships disappearing in route to their destination, as well as (believe it or not) toilets flushing in reverse! Some even attrubute extreme mood swings, feelings of anxiety and frustration to this swirling blue disk.
We may not know what it is or where it is from, but we do know it is not natural or beneficial!
So, what shall happen to the Lacuna Verse if this demonic manifestation continues? The constant disruption to people's lives and efforts is mounting. The common man is feeling the impact of it's presence constantly. Like the scorching heat waves of Solaris 5, crime is sky rocketing and productive work is falling behind. Therefore, we call upon the powers that be to investigate and remedy this terrible situation... before the Lacuna verse becomes known instead as... Laguna verse!
Lacuna Date 6523-05-24 11:24 hours Stellar Time
by Marti Medelsum
As noted in previous Avalonian Chronicles, there have been sightings of a swirling blue disk rampaging and ravaging the Lacuna-verse. Lacuna intelligence agencies have discovered that this is a vile plot by a competing parallel universe. It is almost beyond comprehension, but indeed there is firm evidence that this is all a massive political plot by none other than your own evil twins.
Who will defend the Lacuna-verse? Who will help us against such a dastardly and dreadful enemy? One has stepped forward. He is calm. He is cool (literally). He is... Icydee. We go now on scene...
[Live video feed]
The air rumbles with the flare of patrolling space craft over Polaris 5. Icydee steps out from a
grey cinder block building, stark white hair a contrast to his black trench coat. He pulls down his stylish solar-flare goggles and looks up into the bright sky... toward the swirling blue disk of doom. He squints and mutters, "You're goin down."
He checks his sidearm, an antique Deringer pulse pistol from Lacuna Date 5930. He turns on his repulser shield belt buckle. He adjusts his pocket protector with its packet of pens and miniature slide rule. He installs new batteries in his calculator... and steps toward his custom Stealth Sweeper Mark XVII.
Powering up his ship, the ground shivers and the air quakes. Analysts have continued to wonder what engine he has in that ship, but no sensors have penetrated its hull and no information has ever been leaked on its contents.
He rises from the ground just a few feet and hovers. Dust and debris blows away in all directions. The engine pitch increases and his craft tilts up then jets into the sky. A thin vapor trail streams off each wing tip... and a moment later a sonic boom rolls back through the air.
[End live video feed]
We eagerly await the outcome of this battle. Lacunans everywhere will be affected, from leaders of vast empires to swaddling babes. Icydee, know that we are thinking of you...
TOP TEN WAYS TO KNOW WHEN LAG IS BAD:
The Late Show
by Ravid Detterman
10. When it takes you 15 clicks to perform one action.
9. When you create your max number of spies for your intelligence ministry and the game actually gives you spies OVER that limit.
8. When you type in chat and everyone sees what you wrote... except you.
7. When you are actually grateful for builds that take 3 days.
6. When you dread opening the mail box... because it is an endless vortex of delay.
5. When a Hall built in 15 seconds... refuses to be sacrificed for the greater good AND returns the message "that building doesn't exist" because you sacrificed it on your previous 25 clicks.
4. When your favorite game is renamed to "Laguna".
3. When you get frustrated that people buy your trades because it will take you 5 minutes more to replace just one of them.
2. When you get 10 excavators breaking in a row... because you know it will take you an hour to replace them all.
1. When the Blue Swirly of Doom (yes it even has a name!!!) doesn't just stop spinning - it only appears as an empty box!
Lacuna Date 6523-06-03 14:44 hours Stellar Time
by Marti Medelsum
[Crackling Live Video Feed Zooms In On Marti Medelsum In A Polyester Suit]
The wind is blowing fiercely here on Polaris 5, as we await news of Icydee's endeavors. Reports are have come in of fierce fighting in the upper atmosphere, but something has been hampering all communications and electronic devices until recently. What has become of our hero? Many are awaiting the... wait... whats that up in the sky? Its not a bird... or a plane... its... its him! [Camera turns upward]
In the distance, a trail of black smoke wisps behind a custom Stealth Sweeper Mark XVII. As it draws near, a distinctive asynchronous pulsing sound comes from the engines and several deep scars and blaster marks are etched into its hull. The pitch increases as Icy's ship decelerates and hovers, touching down on the launch pad.
A flight crew races out from the grey cinder block building, some carrying extinguishers to snuff out the smoldering back left of the ship... others carrying medical equipment. As they near the ship, an airlock hisses and opens. We catch a brief glimpse of shadowy movement inside then Icy emerges into view.
He jumps down from the ship, not even waiting for the mobile stairs being brought up. A scratch across his left cheek and a limp in his left leg, he shrugs off the medical attention and begins walking toward the cinder block building. Without stopping he unstraps the broken solar-flare goggles from around his neck and drops them on the ground, a look of determination on his face.
Reporters are kept too far back to ask him any questions, but a spokesman approaches the barricade and the crowd is abuzz with questions. "What happened?" "Is Icydee injured?" "Did he defeat the BSoD?"
The spokesman holds up a hand and the questions subside. "Mr. Dee is being tended to as we speak. We have received his encrypted report just before he landed and will update you on non-sensitive data as soon as possible. What we do know is that the Blue Swirling Disk of Doom is still active (the crowd gasps) but that it has taken a serious hit and has retreated from its previous position. Mr. Dee is determined though and is not finished. Thank you."
With this, the spokesman turns and walks away, and the crowd begins calling out yet more questions.
[Crackling Video Feed Pans Back To Marti Medelsum In His Polyester Suit]
There you have the latest folks. As we can see right now, mechanical personnel are pulling up to work on Icy's ship and there are plans for future sorties. It is progress, as we can tell with the measure of restored communications. So don't give up yet. But, truly, what will it take to overcome this dastardly disk of doom? We do not yet have the full details, but we are standing by to immediately pass on any information we receive to you our faithful views. Stay tuned!
[Crackling Video Feed Fades] Your last glimpse is of Marti pulling out a handkerchief and wiping sweat from his brow... hand shaking.
Somewhere in deep space...
A powered down stealth ship slips into a system containing five rather average planets around a yellow sun. Its single pilot with a shiny solar glare reflective helmet sits in the cockpit.
As he passes the seventh orbital zone he takes up a position near an asteroid, mechanical gas release thrusters bringing his ship to an undetectable halt.
As his vantage point slowly orbits the system, finally orbital zone 8 reveals a massive metallic
structure being constructed. He snaps some photos on a non-electronic camera, noting that the station is apparently in the final stages of development. Perched atop the structure is a giant unfriendly looking cannon of some sort that reminds him of his days watching Star Wars as a child.
Suddenly, a soft clank comes from the aft of the ship. It is so subtle he almost misses it. Yet he turns instinctively to look behind him just as a blast rocks the ship, opening a gapping hole.
Reeling from the shock, training kicks in. Without a thought his hands power the ship and jam the thrusters to full. Barrelling away form the asteroid his port engine flickers on and off, but starboard is at full power. Without checking engine intergrity, or to see who or what was behind him, he hits hyper speed...
Lacuna Date 6523-06-09 19:38 hours Stellar Time
Trade Is Dead
by Alexander Kashinkov
Not long after new ships and technologies have been implimented, the market continues to decline. The over abundance of supply combined with reckless abandon to make even .1 e has driven some to shove top end ships across the SST for .1 to .2 e per ship. Not even a month after they have come online and it is already almost not worth the time to sell them.
Free classes on Trading Basics are opening across the expanse to teach these flunkies how to match or under bid by only a small margin, rather than drop immediately to the .1 e per ship price; but as of yet there are no students signing up.
For those interested in trade, Lacuna is not the place for you.